Bah Humbug.

Ok.

So clearly, I have been slacking in the area of bloggyness. But that doesn't mean that I've disappeared -- hells no. I've just been busy jeez. But fear not! I'm back and filled with plenty-o-rage to blog about. And it's my favorite time of year when it comes to rage: Christmas.

Since WHEN is it ok to play non-stop sappy fucking movies on EVERY channel?! I'm so sick of cryfests over retarded movies (especially those ABC Family Originals...you know what I'm talking about).

I'm tired of people who put antlers on the roof of their car, or wreaths that light up on the grill of their SUV and think it's ok. Let me tell you something -- it's not ok. No. Not by a long shot. Do you really think its worth it to do that shit? That perhaps Santa or Jesus might favor you over others because you're so filled with Christmas spirit that you have to decorate your fucking vehicle to prove it? Gimme a break.

I also don't get the whole reasoning behind playing 24 hours of Christmas music on half of the radio stations here in Massachusetts -- which started in EARLY NOVEMBER. Is this really necessary? I now have to give up some of my cruisin' music to bullshit Dean Martin singing "Here Comes Santa Claus"? I don't believe it. This whole world has gone insane.

The only saving grace about the holidays is the fact that I now can drown my sorrows, pain and aggravation in bottles of Chardonnay with the rest of my dysfunctional family. Whoopee. I mean, the fact that I have to spend time with a family that hates me is a little bit of a downer -- but I mean, with the right consumption of liquor, any family gathering feels ok.

"Oh....you got another tattoo..." turns into "HEY! Awesome tattoo! I wish I could pull this stick out of my ass and get one as well!"

"Oh, you're not going back to school? I mean, my Alina got a perfect SAT score and is now at MIT with a 3.9 GPA." turns into "It is so great you are doing what you want to do as a PERFECTLY CAPABLE ADULT."

"Roller Derby? That seems....interesting." turns into "I wish I could just come out of the closet already and live my life MY way."

Don't get me wrong, sometimes I can have a lot of fun at these functions (it's so easy to fuck with a hardcore Irish Catholic family sometimes). But overall, I wish that my holidays could be spent in the comforts of my apartment, watching Ugly Betty and eating leftovers. There's nothing magical about Christmas for me and I doubt that I can ever enjoy it as much as some of my friends/family do. It's just how I was built -- and Bah fucking Humbug to those of you who are out to change my ways.

Merry effin' Christmas.